Mommy had one of the biggest, prettiest smiles anyone has ever seen. One reason for that is that she had beautiful teeth. She had all of her teeth till the end, and she’d tell you that. But the smile and teeth became obsolete when mommy made her faces. I don’t mean just clowning around, but I mean when something made her make a funny face. Many times it was something she put in her mouth. For instance, about twelve years ago, Mommy became a member of a club at a neighboring church called the “Over Forty Club.” Just like the name said, you had to be over forty years old. I was only thirty eight, but they made an exception for me because they just loved it when I brought her. Anyway, it was time for their annual Christmas affair which was a formal occasion. I really wish I had a picture . . . but Mommy was decked out in a silver formal dress with matching accessories. She was beautiful. After dinner, we sat at the large round table with about five other couples as the speaker came to the mike. One gentleman passed a tin of “Altoid” mints around the table. I knew that the mint was a bit strong for Mommy, but I felt like having just a little fun. Mommy placed the mint into her mouth and she was handling it . . . only for a few seconds. Mommy’s face slowly began to draw up, just a little as she was adjusting her purse in her and a little more when she looked at the table and a little more when she looked up at the speaker and suddenly she had a full fledged “I got to get this out of my mouth” look on her face. Mommy would never take anything from her mouth once in . . . she’d almost always just bare it. As I leaned over to coax her to take it out, the face intensified. By now, the whole table was looking as I did like a parent would do when they wanted the child to spit out the gun. I put my hand under her mouth and strongly requested the mint as she finally let go. She quickly recovered and broke into a hardy laugh as did everyone at the table after they knew that she was OK. But as pretty as Mommy always was, that lady could make a face you wouldn’t believe.
More recently, Mommy and Mary set in the back yard on a warm summer day. I was finishing cutting the yard and tidying up. This was a good day for Mommy because she had plenty jokes this day. As I put the tools up, she talked about my raggedy gardening shirt that I was wearing and continued talking about how dirty my feet were going to be if I didn’t put my shoes back on. She even talked about how skinny my legs were. Oh yeah, she felt good this day. I finished up and went inside for a cold beer . . . this was a hot day. As I drank the cold one from the bottle, I walk over to where Mommy and Mary were sitting. I had a plan. Being that it was rather warm and that it was about time that she wanted her cold water, I knew that making the cold beer sound and look irresistible, she would start signifying. When she felt like it, she was good at it too. Her favorite thing to say was “why are you drinking that ole stuff, I never taught you to drink that ole stuff.” Mary knew what I was about to do, as she just smiled. I said “man oh man, this beer is really, really good . . . you want some Mommy . . . here” . . . and handed her the bottle. She felt so good that day she felt that she would surprise me . . .and took it and took a sip. I just stood and watched, . . . Mommy made a face of all faces and almost frantically, looked around her chair for a place to get rid of it. After she did, the face continued for a few seconds, before she broke into the hardy laugh, all the time asking “what the heck is that.”
Yeah, it was another time when Mommy’s funny faces prevailed. If she put any type of food into her mouth and she didn’t like the taste, THOSE FACES that she made can be seen fifteen miles away.
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